Gratitude From A Hat

My therapist and I are starting to get into some of the issues I still carry from the events that led up to my years of homelessness. We talked about how it would be a good thing to try and find something positive about what happened. She wanted me to find a way to creatively express it. The best way to start the process is for me to make a list of some of my thoughts about the time I spent homeless.

I met two of the dearest, closest friends I've ever had in my life. One with a huge white puff-ball on her head, and the other a little lost girl that played with fire.

I was able to go back to school long enough to learn the computer skills I have now.

I met quite a few extraordinary people. Some who were truly of the earth. Some very brave and courageous. Some had wills of fire, Some were simply noble. Some were bad. Some were downright evil. Some were funny. Some were hilarious, and there were the few that were bat shit crazy.

There's a price for everything. People aren't very willing to do anything for you  for free. The key question being, "What's in it for me?"

Unlike Blanche from, "A Streetcar Named Desire," I have not been able to rely on the kindness of strangers

The chilly, rainy days when there was no place to go. When being wet and miserable just had to be accepted. When you're huddled on the doorstep of an out-of-the-way place in town, and things look their bleakest. You realize just how alone you really are.

I had the wonderful opportunity to test my vocation for six months in a Russian Orthodox Christian Monastery that used to be in Georgia.

You ALWAYS have to watch your back.
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The Winds Of Change

“Humanity sits poised at a precipice; in front of us is an indeterminable pathway, behind us is the shell of a decaying age. We are at the crossroads of our experience; already actions, as well as thinking processes are being set which will determine the nature of a new and extraordinary destiny. Our survival as a thinking species and as well all living things upon the Earth now hangs in the mercy of the Winds of Change. Winds that no longer blow quiet warnings, rather they carry with them a somewhat foreboding message and always deliver a swift altering of our contrived reality through extremely volatile occurrences.”

Dr. Robert Wolf

"As sensitive human beings experiencing such global trauma, we must stay calm and sure, remain at peace, grounded and centred. We must not be carried away by the media messages. In fact, it’s far more healthy to disconnect from TV, newspapers and radio news. The media channels express the darkness and fear that exists on the outer edge of the wound. They suppress the joy of the arising heart beating within the global psyche. A new earth is emerging and forming from the flames of the fear and control that has been our heritage."

David G. Arenson

May the world and all sentient beings ride on the wings of the phoenix as he rises from the ashes of our corrupt and outdated way of being. And as my grandmother would say, "And may we have a little more sense this time..."

Enjoy Life!

Let Go Of The World

Take a few minutes to think, not of what's waiting for you to do, not what you should do, or what you could have done, but about what pleases you most. Dream a little house, room by room. Dream a walk through the garden you'd love to own, plant by plant. Dream a walk through the woods and the plants and animals you will see. If you love a rainy day dream that you can smell and hear the rain. If you love the lake or the ocean...dream that. Take a minute to let go of the world.

I Hear Nature Calling...

Daniel van Flymen

Daniel van Flymen

Falling Slowly

I don't know you

But I want you

All the more for that

Words fall through me

And always fool me

And I can't react

And games that never amount

To more than they're meant

Will play themselves out

Take this sinking boat and point it home

We've still got time

Raise your hopeful voice, you have a choice

You've made it now

Falling slowly, eyes that know me

And I can't go back

And moods that take me and erase me

And I'm painted black

Well you have suffered enough

And warred with yourself

It's time that you won

Take this sinking boat and point it home

We've still got time

Raise your hopeful voice, you have a choice

You've made it now

Falling slowly sing your melody

I'll sing along

The Swell Season

Just Riding Around

Okay, I've decided to add yet two more deity's to my sadhana...Kali, and Durga. I think I am going to get two thangka to put centrally on my Altar. I also need to get one of Vishnu. I'm going to have to invest in some statuary so I can perform a real puja. Right now I reverence and honor the gods by using the thangka as best as I can. I did a little nosing around into the nature of Samadhi which is an ego transcending state of consciousness. Pretty cool stuff if your interested. I also ran across a really good article by Darity Wesley that you should take a look at. Oracle for August - Authenticity.

Enjoy Life!

Spiritual Strategy

I have been doing an incredible amount of research, delving deeply into Hinduism, Tibetan Buddhism, and Tantric Yoga theory. The whole time I've also been bringing up issues from my past that I haven't fully dealt with....the things that I have stuffed. I've had to start working through some of it because in order for them to continue existing within me they have been causing me to subconsciously or unconsciously manifest them in negative thinking and behavior. It's time for me to put them to rest once and for all. Anyway...I got to thinking yesterday about my devotion to Ardhnarishwara. I was considering changing the focus of my Hindu Sadhana (spiritual practice) on Vishnu instead. The more I have contemplated it the more I think I won't change. I will just add more attention to Vishnu. I will probably spend as much time on Vishnu as I spend on Hanuman now. Through all this change and mental activity ( all geared toward reaching my full potential and giving me some clear idea of where I stood spiritually) there has been my Pagan/Wicca beliefs and practices. They have given me a steady foundation from which  I could launch myself in any area I saw fit. They supplied me with a trustworthy tether with which I could safely anchor myself. And when I was ready to rest a weary head, they were there to envelop me in a soft blanket made from early summer moss. I am truly grateful. And then there's the moon that keeps me on track with her never ending cycle. Oh, I didn't share this...I can't believe I haven't already mentioned it. The last treatment I went through for the Hepatitis C Virus was successful! I am cured! Isn't that awesome! Well, that's about all that I wanted to share I guess. I'm leaving the fact that I have somehow gotten Bell's Palsy out kind of on purpose...I'm dealing with it quite well and from the very beginning have seen it as the result of some really bad karmic seeds I must have planted in my past. I am thankfully able to see the absurdity of it, and to be able to see irony in it. While writing I have realized something. It is not I who should be pursuing spirituality, but I should be concentrating on increasing my awareness of it already being within me and in letting it manifest in my outward life. Like the old saying...Let Go And Let God...

Enjoy life guys!  

Appalachian Hemlock

Find Your Inner Yin Yang

You Just Never Know...

Hey guys,

If you have been coming to my blog for awhile then you know that sometimes I go for weeks without posting anything. If you have just found me then now you know! In either case, I hope you keep checking back periodically to see what's happening. You never know what I'm going to post on here. As you may know, I love to study Paganism, Wicca, Hinduism, Tibetan Buddhism, and Tantric Yoga Theory. I have been pretty busy on my other blog, Oracle In The Wind. I also spent a weekend out of town visiting an old friend of mine. I woke up this morning to find that my right eye didn't want to close and that my mouth felt like I had been to the dentist and had some major work done. I thought that I might have had a mild stroke or something so I went to the emergency room. Turns out I have Bell's Palsy. They don't know what causes it, but they think it might be some sort of virus. It is an inflammation of the nerves that control facial muscles. When I blink my left eye does, but my right one stays open. It looks pretty freaky. The right side of my mouth is paralyzed too. Let me tell you it is hard as heck to eat a hot dog with your mouth partially paralyzed! They told me that it wouldn't be permanent....it will just take some time for things to get back to normal. You never know what's going to happen, do ya? Anyway, keep checking back in with me and as always...

Enjoy Life!